Take off your smart casuals and don
Those slacks that ooze with "I'm on holiday."
But do you realise that you're second best,
To a disused PVC factory.

It's what the kids want,
And the parents too.

To just throw the shell suits in the fire,
Polyester style flameproofing never lasts.
Disrobe, age yourselves by undressing,
Like fine wines age the garments of the past.

The secret of staying young, it isn' t what you wear,
Clothes were that much nicer years ago.
You see it is no faux-pas to grow old
With your clothes, never trust a man in a bum-bag.

I guess I'm no romantic, I don't care for semantics as well,
Don't get me wrong, no, I quite like the song.
And so I sit here for lyrical genius to take hold,
But it's too much to ask to be half of Matt Cole?
Progress into the town, soak up monoxide and sounds,
It's enough to worry a cynic. I guess there's nothing in it.
I find the skateboards a bore, down to the club and sweep the floor.
Is it too much to ask? Oh oh oh oh.

To just throw the shell suits in the fire,
Polyester style flameproofing never lasts.
Disrobe, age yourselves by undressing,
Like fine wines age the garments of the past.

All the high street shops are shouting "For sale, for sale,"
"Come and buy our products and you'll end up looking half your age."
Did you see the advert on the TV screens?
Saw the models in all their glory and thought "Shit, that could be me,"
Four and twenty years ago,
They called me groovy, oh they thought I used to care.
But now, now my years are pressing on,
I still spend all my leisure time wondering what to wear.

Leisurewear.